jeudi 27 mars 2014

A Strategy For Raising Teens: The CALM Technique

By Saleem Rana


Dr. Laura Kastner is a psychologist and writer. She spoke to Lon Woodbury on "Parenting Choices for Struggling Teens," which is a radio talk show that is hosted on L.A. Talk Radio. She talked about raising children by going from CALM to sensible. CALM is an acronym for useful steps a bewildered mother or father could begin to take to establish self-discipline in a troubled teenager. Throughout the radio interview, she explained a variety of sensible methods based on establishing strong self-regulation that mothers and fathers could take when confronted by an angry teen.

Lon Woodbury is the founder of Struggling Teens and Woodbury Reports and he has assisted families and struggling adolescents since 1984. Besides his work as an Educational Specialist, he is a prolific author, and his Parent Empowerment book series is available on amazon.

Regarding Dr. Laura Kastner

Dr. Laura Kastner has authored four books on parenting: The Seven Year Stretch, The Launching Years, Getting to Calm, and Wise-Minded Parenting. She is a clinical psychologist with her own private practice, as well as a clinical professor, with positions in a variety of departments, including Psychology, Psychiatry and the Behavioral Science departments at the University of Washington.

The Key to Parenting Kids, Going from CALM to wise

Among the most essential parenting skills necessary in taking care of kids is learning to be sensible under pressure, said Dr. Kastner, who believes in teaching parents self-control. This is necessary because when a teen faces their mother or father, the situation normally explodes into a shouting match. Moms and dads must find out how maintain their own self-control to ensure that they can begin to model self-control for their teens.

CALM, she clarified, is an acronym for the steps a parent could use for self-control when in conflict with their adolescent. C is for cool down and focus on your breathing; A is for assessing your choices in the moment; L is for listening closely with compassion; and M is mapping your strategy.

In discussing why most teens act out, Dr. Kastner clarified that at around the age of 13, kids were in the middle of a transformative brain change, known as remodeling, that was biologically wired into them. Their minds resembled a 'website under construction' due to the fact that they were starting to prepare to reach adulthood and independent living. Just how teenagers responded to this biological modification relied on their temperament. Some were quiet, some looked for mischief and others fell to depths of depression. Moms and dads needed to quit leading with their feelings, and establish a tranquil, clear, and assertive parenting design.




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